Honor and Shame

In the world in which Jesus lived, the possession of honor and the avoidance of shame were essential core values that drove private and public interaction.  To possess honor was of the highest value.  Without honor, a person had no dignity. 

Mediterranean cultures developed strategies to preserve the insider as honorable and outsider as shamed.  One shaming strategy was to ask an opponent a question he could not answer. This explains why the Scribes and Pharisees were always trying to ask Jesus questions he couldn't easily answer.  If they could take away his honor, they would also take away his popularity.  However, they actually allowed Jesus to gain more honor, since he often answered their questions with clever replies--something that increased a person's honor in other people's eyes.

The Catholic hierarchy still engages in similar strategies to preserve the insider as honorable (Hierarchy) and the outsider (LGBT) as shamed.  Instead of asking questions, they make statements and allow no room for dialogue.   If you dare to questions their beliefs you are called a heretic or immoral.  If you work or volunteer with the Church you are removed from your ministry.

In the current struggle for marriage equality Archbishop Salvatore Cordileone, Chair of the subcommittee for the Promotion and Defense of Marriage for the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops (USCCB) argues that allowing gay marriage will harm society; especially our children.  

People of faith and goodwill are no longer willing to remain silent on this issues.  Like Jesus they are answering their questioners.   The nation’s largest pediatricians’ group recently came out in support of gay marriage, noting that, to a child, the parents’ sexual orientation is not as important as other elements related to family well-being.

"The AAP supports marriage equality for all capable and consenting adults, including those who are of the same gender, as a means of guaranteeing all federal and state rights and benefits and long-term security for their children."  

"If a child has two loving and capable parents who want to marry, it is in the best interests of the child that legal and social institutions allow and support the parents to do so, irrespective of their sexual orientation."

The academy also added,

"Adoption placements and foster parenting also should be conducted without regard to sexual orientation of the parents."

The AAP policy was developed by its committee on psychosocial aspects of child and family health, led by Dr. Benjamin S. Siegel, a pediatrics professor at Boston University School of Medicine.  “On the basis of a review of extensive scientific literature,” AAP affirms that “children’s well-being is affected much more by their relationships with their parents, their parents’ sense of competence and security, and the presence of social and economic support for the family than by the gender or the sexual orientation of their parents.”

The American Academy of Pediatrics is not the only one speaking out, the American Psychological Association and the American Medical Association with the nations other major mental and medical organizations have filed a amici curiae brief in the DOMA Suit in contrast to the US Bishop's statements.  In their brief they stated:

The claim that legal recognition of marriage for same–sex couples undermines the institution of marriage and harms their children is inconsistent with the scientific evidence. That evidence supports the conclusion that homosexuality is a normal expression of human sexuality that is not chosen; that gay and lesbian people form stable, committed relationships that are equivalent to heterosexual relationships in essential respects; and that same-sex couples are no less fit than heterosexual parents to raise children and their children are no less psychologically healthy and well-adjusted than children of opposite sex parents.

No longer are people willing to remain silent for fear of being labeled unfaithful or immoral by the Church's hierarchy.  People of faith and goodwill are speaking out through evidence based research and a lived experience of the gay community and like Jesus gaining honor in answering the Pharisees questions. 

The Church's hierarchy continues to lose creditability in their fight against marriage equality  They have turned a deaf ear to the gay community and their children.  Instead of strengthening families, they have weakened it through their beliefs about the gay community.  Beliefs based on fear, stereotypes, and prejudice instead of evidence based research. 

Peace and all good,
Brother Sun and Sister Moon

Download the amici curiae brief supporting Karen Golinski's discrimination case against the government, Golinski v. Office of Personnel Management for more information on evidence based research on marriage equality.

Personal Reflection:
Have you ever been afraid to speak out on behalf of yourself or your gay child, sibling or friend?  How did you feel?  Feel free to share your story in the comment spaces below.